Redesign coming soon. Hopefully that will encourage me to start posting again. Happy Foodtalknap Day! I'm headed over to James' sister's house for Thanksgiving dinner in about an hour. Can't wait to make a complete pig out of myself. I won't know everyone there so to avoid awkwardness in conversation, I'll just say when asked any questions, "Hey! Can't you see I'm eatin' here!" and then turn my head down and rejoin the pig session. Hope everyone enjoys the holidays.

A monkey blankets an orange mentally with the desire to eat.

Clay - I just wanted to mention outloud to everyone that your last post about Aubrey's page being a memorial was completely misunderstood by me and probably everyone else. I thought you were saying that because she hasn't posted that her page was a lonely memorial, but I never noticed what you were actually pointing out. And that was the time and date of the post. Don't know why I didn't catch that, because I was signing her up when I received a phone call from Chris Lea saying that two of the WTC had been hit by planes.

Phil - eh... so I was wrong. Never met a violet before. I got the spirituality right... indigo in color is not that far from violet...and uh... hey, I was drunk when I made the assessment.

Well, it's been years since I looked at my aura book. Mainly because I finally realized I was riding some big ego trip that the book creates from the Indigo color, but I really like the book and if all can take it with a grain of salt then it's a blast. Just because I'm stoned and really feel like typing I'll write out Blue as an example for Carrie. This gets very lengthy so be warned. (if anyone else wants the description for their aura color then I'll try to scan the pages or something and e-mail the info.)

BLUE -

Blues embody the characteristics of nurturing and care-taking. They are the Personality Spectrums color most concerned with helping other people. Whereas Nurturing Tans find their life's work in the community, Blues find value in being of service to individuals. Service is a form of altruism, a giving of oneself. It is the art of anticipating the needs of other human beings and ministering to those needs while at the same time allowing the individuals to maintain their dignity. In doing a dindness for a neighbor or performing an act of mercy for a patient, Blues feel fulfilled, valued, and of worth; they find ways to live their lives by giving.
The greatest challenge for Blues is to know what they need to be happy and then to ask for it. Because they are so caught up in service to others, Blues often spend too little time and attention on their own spiritual and emotional growth activities. They must set limits and boundaries on their emotional, physical, and spiritual resources; they must be able to say no and mean it. Blues need to emulate the wise cook who returns a portion of the starter dough to the yeast pot for another day. In this way, Blues can maintain their personal power. They must learn how to husband their own internal resources by measuring thenm out and using some of their time and energy to renew themselves.

BLUEs Approach to Physical Reality

Blues do not find much to recommend physical reality. To them it is dirty, harsh, and ugly. Even an idyllic country scene viewed from a hilltop is, on close inspection, found to be alive with thousands of creepy, crawling bugs. Blues tend to live in the realm of emotions and feelings, which are more real to them than the external environment.
Left to their own devices, Blues do not particularly care for strenuous, sweaty physical activity or exercise. It makes them hot and sticky, a most unpleasant experience. However, they do enjoy sports that have a component of camaraderie, such as softball, volleyball, and bowling, or a component of grace and beauty, such as dancing, swimming, and horseback riding. They enjoy walking as a way of experiencing nature or being with friends out-of-doors. Exercise classes that incorporate gentle stretching, with a less hectic atmosphere than aerobics, appeal to Blues. Endurance sports requiring constant physical conditioning generally do not attract Blues, because they perceive that amount of attention to oneself as indulgent and narcissistic.
Blues tend to have an endomorphic body type - the "earth mother" figure. Tehy put on weight easily, especially after the birth of children. In an era with so much emphasis on diet, exercise, slender figures, and no hips, Blues are at a disadvantage. Full-figured, especially after menopause, Blues need to understand that their beauty lies in their ability to nurture and support others and in their pleasing personalities.

BLUEs Mental Attitudes

The Blues' greatest gift is their highly develooped intuition. They are extremely sensitive to the emotional vibrations of others. However, it is extremely difficult for them to translate what they know intuitively into useful information. In the decision-making process, emotions, feelings, and hunches are not usually given equal weight with the facts and figures. Therefore, Blues feel less adequate than other colors when it comes to making an intellectual contribution. The ability to collect, sort, and retrieve information is an acquired skill, one that Blues must learn, specifically through training in critical thinking.
Like all the Emotional/Spiritual Colors, Blues are holistic thinkers. They grasp all the parts of a disscussion or decision-making model simultaneously, juggling outcomes and the attendant consequences, assessing and evaluating cause and effect, always holding open the alternative options.
If a Green thinks in a binary manner, cutting and paring options at every choice point on the binary tree, a Blue mentally hangs on to the whole tree, never letting go of any of the potential options. since Blues hold all the alternative solutions simultaneously in mind, it is no wonder they have a difficult time making decisions! Blues can get bogged down in the details and feel unsure of where they are going or how to proceed. The most important skill a Blue can learn is how to focus, to cut away all issues and concerns that do not have immediate pertinence to the problem at hand.
In school, Blues do well in subjects that place a high degree of emphasis on intuition or feelings: literature, creative writing, art, and drama. Those subjects requiring a linear approach, like mathematics or the hard sciences, teach the skills of memorization, organization, and building hierarchies. These are the subjects that assist Blues in learning to handle real-world data. It is frustrating for Blues to know the answer to a math problem and not know how they got it.
Although they are highly emotional, Blues can do well in businessk, especially those having a service component that allows Blues to work closely with other people. Blues are capable of making decisions; they are just slower and more deliberate than other colors. They lack the organizational ability of the Mental Tan or the Green, and the strong personal ego of a Violet.
Blues need to create schedules for coping with business situations, schedules that allow them sufficient time to work at their own speed. Blues need three to seven days to make a big decision. Given that time, space, and quiet, Blues make good decisions that are well thought out and to which they are committed. To be comfortable emotionally, they need to ask that all proposals and complaints be put in writing. This gives them an opportunity to separate the feelings from the action and to create a solution that they can support.
Blues weigh all of the factors that must be taken into consideration in any decision-making process: previous commitments, needs of family and self, the merits of the project, and the intended outcome. When confronted with employers and customers who demand instant decisions, Blues must be honest about their motives and requirements before they take any action. Blues take business setbacks personally. In the world of the Mental Family colors, everything is first an idea; in the world of the Blues, everything is first an emotion. Acknowledging their feelings and being willing to keep moving in spite of them allows Blues to function successfully in the world of business.
The greatest asset a Blue has is emotional commitment. This is part of the Blues' mental emotional process - they see the ptential inherent in good ideas, and they want to help others achieve their goals. Any idea, project, or individual to whom a Blue is bound is indeed fortunate. A committed Blue is reliable, dependable, and trustworthy.

BLUEs Emotional Makeup

Blue is the color of female energy and uniquly reflects one aspect of feminine energy - the ability to get in touch with and express one's feelings. Blues make sense of the world through their emotions rather than through physical sensations, as Yellows and Physical Tans do. Love, hate, hope, despair - these are everday facts of life for Blues. Emotions are the data base on which they make decisions and take actions.
This ability to act from an emotional center is the Blues' greatest asset, but it can also be their greatest liability. They want to love and care for others and are perceived as loving, thoughtful, kind, and helpful. The liability comes when emotional confusion clouds the facts of a situation, preventing the Blues from making the best decisions. They are unable to discern, for example, the difference between being taken advantage of and being asked to give a little extra effort to achieve success.
Because they are so sensitive and pick up nonverbal cues to the moods of others, Blues are not acknowledged for what they know. Mates and employers, who use a more rational approach, ask what data the Blues have to support their opinion. Since the data are usually feelings, they are discounted as irrelevant, unspecific, or unscientific. In our society, the intuitive knowledge of a Blue is sometimes disconcerting and may seem irrelevant to those with a more mental outlook. However, in those areas of life where their specific gift is necessary, where nurturing and caretaking are essential to the continued well-being of the family and community, Blues are perceived as necessary and valuable. Blues love people. To serve others is their life's work. A Blue's sense of well-being comes from tending to the needs of significant others. This caretaking can take the form of cooking, cleaningk, and throwing parties, or of listening, accompanying a friend to the doctor, and giving advice. One of the hazardsfor a Blue is being taken for granted by family and others, Blues open themselves to being used, failing to ask for repayment in kind. Blues assume that others are as sensitive as they are. The truth is that others don't see the Blues' needs and even if they do, they will let the Blues bear the burden. This leaves Blues feeling unappreciated for the effort they have made.
To combat this, Blues need to be much more assertive. They need to learn to set limits on their service, to communicate their expectations clearly (including monetary considerations), and to take action if their requests for gratification are not honored. In short, they must learn assertive communication skills. The more they allow themselves to be victimized, the more sorry they feel for themselves, which leads to a resort to a whole cycle of complaint, which sometimes leads to real and imagined illnesses, the most serious of which is the loss of self-esteem and respect.
Blues must learn that their needs are as important as the wants and needs of others. They must learn to nurture themselves, to give to themselves as generously as they give to others.
Blues need to nurture the emotional side of their personality. Activities that support this include keeping a journal, writing, reading, listening to music, enjoying quiet times alone or outdoors, being with friends, and being listened to. Without an opportunity to sort out their jumble of feelings, Blues find themselves in an endless morass of emotions without resolution.
Blues express their emotions through the language of laughter and tears, both of which bubble to the surface easily and quickly, much to the Blues' embarrassment. This is not an affectation, but rather the spontneous release of pent-up emotion that, if kept inside, would cause physical problems like headaches.
Blues know intuitively that language is a poor medium ofexpression for the rich depth and texture of what goes on inside them. They are touched deeply by sunsets, church music, and being with a loved one. When they and their partner have mated at the spiritual level, Blues are so overcome with the emotion of that experience that they express their joy and happiness in tears.
Blues also cry when they are angry. Contrary to popular opinion, Blues do not use tears as a manipulative device for getting their own way. When confronted with an agnry spouse or employer, they should first express the emotion represented by the tears. - anger, rage, frustration, helplessness, or betrayal. Only then can they move into a more rational discussion of the situation and search for alternative resolutions.
Blues understand that htere is an underlying logic to what they are feeling. They cannot explain it; they can only feel the emotions. For them to ignore or disparage this aspect of themselves is to abdicate the source of their power. When in touch with their feelings, Blues are galvanized into action. For Blues, emotions are the coin of human interaticon, without which there is nothing worthwhile.

well, that enough I suppose... I love the book, but it's like the beatles for me now... already heard it a million times. The actual book is so much cooler than that web page I found. "What Color Is Your Aura" by Barbara Bowers, if anyone is interested... anyway, my trip down aura memory lane is done now.

Phil - The book I was talking about is "What color is your aura?" by Barbara Bowers. There have been many books since that original book using her system If you really want to dive into the cult that has been created about Indigo's specifically then look up books like "The Indigo Children". Basically I saw you as Indigo because of your reserved nature, deep spiritual sense, non-conformity, willing to take a non-prestigious career, direct honesty, etc.. there is alot of stuff about the Indigo that just seemed you. I've only met two in my life besides myself, so somewhat because you seemed like the other one I met, I threw you in that catagory. Here's a brief test I just found for anyone to take. I'm pretty sure this lady's system is based on Barbara Bowers.

This lady calls some of the auras by different names like nurturing tan is sensitive tan, mental tan is logical tan, etc...
Some other auras that I would guess or already know from taking the real book test are: (some of these are pretty far reaches)

JimS. - Green
JimA. - Blue
Phil - Indigo
John - Lavender
Ned - Crystal
Heidi - Yellow
Dave - Green
ChrisH. - Mental Tan
Sonya - Magenta
Sean - Crystal
Shari - Green
Clint - Nurturing Tan
Becky - Red
Hank - Crystal
Liz - Magenta?
Amos - Mental Tan?

I was going to try to guess everyone, but some people are just too difficult to catagorize. (Not that anyone wants to be catagorized, but this is all in fun.)

Thank you Sean and Sonya for a cool party. I was making alot of noise in your basement for how late it was when I finally left. Hope the neighbors weren't bothered by it. I woke up extremely disoriented at Ned's with a little help from a wake n' bake n'nap and took a b-line from the couch to the truck without telling anyone good-bye. It took me about 20 miles of the road before I was actually awake and thinking straight. It was nice to finally put real people to the blogs. Thanks to Shari's page I had seen a glimpse of all those people, but meeting them in real life was very enjoyable. I remember drunkenly telling Phil he was an Indigo. (just a silly aura book I've had for about 10 or so years that I've showed Ned. No explanation to Phil at all, just said "Duh, hey you're an Indigo!" He must have thought I was an idiot. Anyway, I had tons of fun and hope I get to meet more of the Tanque someday. Shari got me thinking strongly about going back to school. My current money situation has to be my priority until I'm financially stable again, but I'm getting dreams of going back to school and getting a masters in Remote Sensing/GIS. My undergrad degree is in GIS. I might as well start looking into grants and scholarships and such to see what colleges offer what. IU would be a great college town to live, but I should probably look around at other schools as well.

well, it's 3:30 and we're still not off yet. Jim went to drop his dog off at his sister's and hasn't come back yet. Hang over still hasn't kicked in yet... I'm putting this miracle up there with me getting my college degree. What a cool world.

Well, I blew it. I was very, very, drunk last night. I'm still not hung over this morning. I'm still in that morning, still drunk, shock phase. Terrible, awful... I know the trip down to Bloomington will turn into hell along the way. Sorry bloggers, you're going to get Zombie Ben instead of Ben. Jimmy quit drinking an hour before we passed out, but I have a feeling he's not much better. Just know I'm there somewhere in spirit... I'm sure once the alcohol starts flowing that I'll perk up a bit. It's 2pm and we're about an hour from heading off. See y'all soon.

Within the same week of me deleting Hank's (Chris Hill (for Di)) link because I think he has given up, he goes and writes a huge ass post. Like I said before... I'll be fixin' up the links this next week sometime. He's still linked on the main df page.

The links on this page will be corrected whenever I get enough energy to get off my ass, go through my suitcases to find the Flash software, search the net for cheat codes, install the damn thing, then make my corrections. I think that could happen within a week.

Welcome Todd! I absolutely adored Athens when I went to school there, and even when I didn't go to school at all. It's a fun town. I had almost turned into a Townie by the time I left.

In a slight correction of what Jimmy said about my philosophy on time, I don't think that it's a loop. Time is just eternal... always has been, always will. And even if it is not, my point in Jim and I's discussion was that I don't feel it is necessary to create a creator to explain the beginning when we can't explain the creation of a creator. A view I have expressed since about 12 yrs. old and still feel is pretty valid. If there was a beginning, then we will just have to wait and be patient in hopes that science will eventually open up our perspective on creation. Until then, my closest feeling of resolution on the matter is that there is no beginning and no end.

I bought a bed yesterday, a fold out twin. $25. What a bargain. My goals are slowly changing, and I'm feeling like Indy is the place where I need to dig in for now. I was thinking that I was going to get a quick contract job and then move on to West Palm Beach, but just buying food and paying my student loan and trying to come up with the money to pay for a car/insurance/tags...etc... Anyway, my goal now is to just try to work contract jobs until I get a permanent one here, get my car, get a 6 month lease on an apartment and work from there to save enough money to move to West Palm Beach safely and securely.

I'm really looking forward to seeing as many of the tanque as possible at Sonya and Sean's on Saturday. I can't wait. Tonight I'm headed out to the bars with my bro Clay and two unknown (to me) women for whom my brother said that I need to come along so that he can verify to his wife that nothing happened. hmmm... we'll see about that. I forgot who Clay said they were, but I think it was an ex-co-worker and her sister or something that's in town. I don't plan on getting too crazy, because the thought of showing up to meet the tanquers in a zombie like hang-over from hell, just doesn't seem like a very friendly thing to do.

Made it... that was the worst long ass plane and bus ride of my life. It's good to finally have arrived, got drunk, and passed out. I already have a contract job here.. First day! Yeah!!!
I took the religion thingy test... here were my top results.
1. Theravada Buddhism (100%)
2. Unitarian Universalism (97%)
3. Secular Humanism (88%)
4. Atheists and Agnostics (84%)
5. Liberal Quakers (82%)
6. Neo-Pagan (72%)

Post more later... much to do.